יש לי שלל פסח

יש לי שלל פסח

In the delivery room

tokomon:

mother: is it a boy or a girl?

doctor: *puts baby between teeth* it’s a metaphor

bongfucker:

want to stop losing followers? delete your blog

silenthill:

*puts my bro’s dick in my hand*

see, its a metaphor. it’s only gay if i jack it

awwww-cute:

All ears

awwww-cute:

All ears

cyberuser:

cyberuser:

vvankinq:

cyberuser:

what do you call a message sent by a girl?

*sighs* what

a feMAIL

i got 7 messages saying this joke is offensive & that i’m the reason feminism exists

thetindog:

theladthatlived:

georgesus:

"He’s a little fighter. He kind of, he wriggles around quite a lot.” - Prince William

its like when you take dogs out of water and they carry on swimming

MOTHER, UNHAND ME, I HAVE A COUNTRY TO GOVERN

the-nestene-consciousness:

strawberry-taffy:

having an old tiny worrisome asian lady as my mother is a small burden

"i love u my dumpling"